How not to order your steak

It's all too easy to let your imagination run away with you when confronted with a language all-too-closely-related to English. At first glance, it would appear that Jensen's House of Bof, brazenly advertising its wares in shameless red neon, has located itself in the wrong district.

When asked how you would like your bof, a strategic answer is "tender."

But then, learning that the sign in the above photo translates verbatim to Jensen's Beefhouse doesn't much improve things. Imagine what it's like being a waiter there: "Welcome to our beefhouse! How pink would you like your meat?" How many times can one dine there before indulging in at least one or two vulgar puns? And then how many lowbrow double entendres can one waiter endure before giving in to despair? There's a verbal reckoning coming soon at Jensen's, and I for one don't want to be there when it arrives.